EMT on suspension after pooping pants three shifts in a row

EMT Eric Stercus decided to lose some weight for New Years. After talking to friends and co-workers he decided to add a high fiber body detox cleanse to his weight loss regime. Unfortunately the high fiber detox made bowel movements too easy and multiple pant filling accidents have taken place.

In his own words EMT Stercus said “I had been on the cleanse for a few days and was feeling very gassy. Then on one run I was lifting the cot and it was just an involuntary muscle thing. The pressure of lifting a somewhat heavy dude caused a little eruption. At first I assumed it was going to be a fart, but no it was liquid.”

Upon arrival at the ER with the patient the EMT ran, well more like waddled, to a staff locker room to shower and put on some surgical scrubs. His crew mate found it funny. But then it happened again the next day and the day after that.

Management did not find it so funny. “What kind of image are we giving our patients and their families when an EMT shits his pants lifting a dam cot. The sounds the smells… it is just nasty. I applaud the man for wanting to shed a few pounds, but until his BMs are back to normal I have to take him off the schedule.”

“I am not mad they suspended me” EMT Stercus said “it is nice because now I am able to take an extra scoop of the fiber drink and it will make this detox more effective. I am just more likely to hit my goal weight this year now.”

Many of the medical professionals we talked to about detox diets said that these fads don’t do shit as it related to real sustainable weight loss.