National Orginization to create new level of EMT.

Let it never be said that National Registry does not listen to its card holders! After hearing Nick McDublin, an EMT working 911 in New York, complain that fast food workers would soon be paid $7 per hour more than he makes, they decided to create a new level of EMT that oddly falls between AEMT and Paramedic.

EMT Patch“Society is obviously changing, and EMS must change with it.” Stated Nancy Fry, a spokesperson for National Registry of Emergency medical Workers (NREMW). “Jobs that require no education, training, work experience, or skill are now seen as nearly twice as important as your standard EMT is. To keep up with our evolving public, our new level of medical provider, called EMT-Ws (short for EMT-Waiters) will not be required to have a high school diploma, will receive no medical training, and possess no skill other than to ask ‘would you like oxygen with that?’”

Several EMS providers ranging from fire departments, to third service, to private companies have already expressed their excitement towards this new idea. “We look forward to the change, and while we are keeping our EMTs at $10/hour we will be hiring the new less educated, less trained, and skilless EMT-Ws at $15/hour. It’s just what the public wants.” Stated Pete Wilson, an operations manager for Medic Mid West.

“The new level of care is just amazing! We plan on replacing our entire staff of paramedics with EMT-Ws!” Said Captain Robert Wilkes of the Chipahassee Fire Department.

The first wave of 100 EMT-Ws have graduated the first class hosted at the National EMS Academy. These new life-savers were recruited from several GED programs and have completed a strenuous 10 minute class and passed a National Registry Exam. There are reports that the one-question national registry test has already been leaked online, but that has yet to be confirmed. Overall the reactions from the EMT-Ws has been positive.

“I feel really good about the training,” exclaimed Tom Jackson, who is officially the first EMT-W, “and I’m really glad I don’t have to waste all that money on getting my diploma or even my GED!”

“I’m just really glad they don’t do background checks! I was turned down from an EMT-B course earlier because of my…er… record… but now I can tell those snooty Basic’s what to do!” Said Jackie Collins, another recent graduate.

UPDATE- Due to several complaints from EMT-Bs and Paramedics, National Registry has required all EMT-Ws to wear a paper hat and apron to distinguish them on the scene of a call.

About Ricky RazQue

Ricky RazQue was an undercover PETA agent sent into the field of EMS to observe and report on animal cruelty. Unfortunately, after having to kill the HIPPA HIPPO in self defense, Ricky was removed from PETA, leaving him to fend for himself in the ambulances